Yesterday I had my first massage. A lot of people love the massage. It's supposed to feel good. It's supposed to be relaxing. It's supposed to be good for you. I've always been a little uncomfortable letting a stranger go to town on me in such a "familiar" way. I'm rather ticklish. Also I'm afraid of getting a boner in the middle of the whole thing.
But I had a rough day yesterday and my body -- especially my left arm and wrist -- has just felt a little wrecked and out of whack for a while and my dad insisted that I give the massage a go.
I figured I could assuage my biggest fears (the ones relating to blood flow) by just "takin' care of business" myself before heading out (it occurs to me that maybe it's this sort of behavior that's giving my left arm so much trouble and NOT all the computer usage like I first thought).
With that dirty deed taken care of I head off to some small "alternative wellness center" in Carlsbad. I enter the building and the surroundings inside make me instantly skeptical. Smelly soaps, and candles adorn the shelves along side the myriad of new age self-help books. The soft, soothing, and vaugley "ethnic" sounds of Yanni style music fills the air. Blech. I guess it's too much to expect a lil RJD2 or Thievery Corporation.
Eventually I find myself mostly naked on that strange table with that toilet seat thing you put your face in at the end of it and the touching begins. Due to the masseuse using both her forearms and hands, along with some sort of oil or lubricant, my initial thoughts on the experience was that it felt like I was getting a tongue bath from a couple of elephants. It wasn't necessarily unpleasant...just weird.
The rest of the experience vacillated between slightly painful, sorta ticklish, and vaguely uncomfortable with splashes of genuine relaxation. I felt like I was doing something that was good for me...but I'm not sure I completely "enjoyed" the whole experience. My body definitely feels better today AND I managed to avoid an embarrassing moment Vis-à-vis my genitals. So that's a win-win-win.
It's been a long time since my last post and between than and now I have somehow managed to get myself into another failed relationship. Unlike the last one, this one ended less pleasantly for me (not that the last one ended like a day at Disneyland, but it wasn't a kick in the pants either). I can't remember being with a person who seemed so compatible. Who seemed to fit my life and my values so well. It all sorta crashed down so abruptly too. One day I was being told how amazingly fantastic I was and the next day I was told to hit the road.
I guess that makes it sound a little bit stranger than it actually is. The person I was dating has some health issues and decided (for the both of us I guess) that I shouldn't be dragged down by her problems. So...I don't really know what to say to that. I was really happy being with her. Maybe those problems would have eventually gotten to me. Maybe I'm better off without that complication. It didn't seem like it as of a couple of days ago. It doesn't seem like it today.
So...yes. The title track for today's blog has a double meaning! 1) A (not-so)funny joke about massages and 2) Also my life is a trite teenage drama.